Life seldom works out exactly as I planned. Circumstances change, and mistakes can be made too. A sudden change of circumstances is very overwhelming to me. The uncertainty feels paralysing. There are unhealthy ways that I used in the past to deal with being overwhelmed, such as procrastination or even giving up on tasks. Even today, these harmful coping mechanisms are present in my mind when I am very overwhelmed. However, I try not to give in to my old habits. Instead, I follow a method that personally helped me recover from being overwhelmed. 

The first thing I do is recognise that I am overwhelmed, allowing myself to feel my feelings. Denying my feelings of being overwhelmed leads me to avoid what makes me overwhelmed. Therefore, avoiding feelings doesn’t seem to fix the problem but instead enables me to procrastinate an overwhelming task. Talking to friends and family about my challenges helps a lot. Voicing my challenges can be validating. It makes me feel like I am not alone. Validating my feelings also makes it easier to take the first step to recovering from being overwhelmed.

Once I’ve faced my feelings, I let my nervous system calm down. I do this by allowing myself some time to relax before figuring out how to manage the change and uncertainty that overwhelmed me in the first place. This is important because it allows me to tackle the challenge I’m facing with a clear and rational mind once I feel calm and grounded. 

“Although I cannot stop myself from being overwhelmed when I face sudden change or face a new challenge, I can learn to recover from being overwhelmed.”

When I calm down, I start to focus on prioritising tasks. Prioritising helps me break down the challenge one step at a time, making it less intimidating. Then, I start to brainstorm solutions. The more possibilities, the more confident I feel about doing the tasks. An overwhelmed state can make me think that overcoming a challenge is impossible, but a calm and solution-focused mind can find many ways to overcome a challenge. Once choosing the seemingly best solution, making the first step toward a solution usually puts me back on track, and I feel empowered to tackle the challenge I’m facing.

Although I cannot stop being overwhelmed when I face a sudden change or a new challenge, I can learn to recover from being overwhelmed. The feelings of being overwhelmed don’t get less intense, but I can bounce back faster now. 

It is also essential to ask for help when feeling overwhelmed. This is hard for me as I don’t like to ask for help. I prefer to handle my problems alone. However, when I ask for help, challenges resolve faster and easier. It is truly a paradox: I am afraid to ask, but I cannot name a time when I’ve ever regretted asking for help.

Although I have a current method, I am open to evolving my coping skills in the future. I hope that sharing my experience with you helps if you feel overwhelmed. You are not alone. I wish you the best in tackling the challenges you face in your life. I am rooting for you!

Main Photo Credit: Christian Erfurt on Unsplash